June 25th, 2019

How to Have a Good Conversation; Part Two

A conversation is so much more than words:
a conversation is eyes, smiles, the silences between the words.
(Sister-in-laws bonding. I love to see this!) (Father's Day, 2019)

Try to make your conversation positive, for the most part. We all have problems that we need to be able share, but try not to dwell on those negative things for too long. Keep the whining about your boss minimal. If someone takes the time to spend with you, don't express to them that they never have time for you. Don't talk about the bad news going on in the world. Keep conversations about all of your health problems brief. Speak honorably about your mate, parents and grandparents, expressing gratitude for what they have done for you. If your recent camping trip was a disaster, try to say something good about the trip.

If you want good, healthy, fulfilling, and on-going conversations (relationships) with people, be mostly positive and encouraging rather than depressing and negative. Generally, we avoid negative people because, yes, life is hard and we all need to be encouraged and up-beat to help us all keep going.

(Photo by Rebekah Aardsma Eschbach.
Used by permission. June, 2019)

If you don't have something nice to say about someone, then don't say anything at all. Sometimes, silence is golden.

Focus on what the other person is saying not what you're going to say next. Don't be afraid of pauses in the conversation.

Tamara Aardsma: "Swinging on a Sunday morning."
(Photo by Caleb Aardsma. Used by permission.
June, 2019.)

Don't stray into topics that are obviously not of general interest. Watch for cues from others, like people leaving the room, or nodding off.

Don't take yourself too seriously. A sign of an emotionally stable person is one who can laugh at themselves. Don't worry about embarrassing yourself, making a mistake or looking silly. Like my son Tim is fond of saying, "Get over yourself." (In my younger days we called this "taking yourself with a grain of salt.") We all know we aren't perfect. Why pretend? Join in the fun!

I am working on improving my conversations! Thanks for taking a few minutes to learn and grow with me!

My darlin' wearing the Polly Flinders dress I found thrifting.
C'est adorable n'es pas?

Did you know you can use the lid from
a jar of Parmesan cheese on a canning jar?
(Idea from Esther Aardsma)

Blessings,
Helen